Dating Tips for the Newly Single

If you’re newly single, taking the first steps towards dating again may seem like a monumental task.

But armed with our common sense refresher guide to online dating, you too can explore the new world of romantic possibilities online dating offers with safety — and success — in mind.

1. Request a Photo

Because no matter how much you believe that personality is more important than looks, you know that deep down you couldn’t possibly date someone who looks like Danny Devito or Hillary Rodham Clinton.

On a practical note, having a photo of your date means that you will be able to spot them when you arrive at the agreed meeting place, and not spend the evening wondering if that poor bugger sitting alone at the bar downing his third martini is actually waiting for you…

2. Who, What, Where

Leave important contact details — such as your date’s name and cell phone number — with a trusted friend and, if you’re a parent, your child minder.

Be sure to let someone know where you are going and for how long; it might even be worth including the phone number of the cafe or bar you’re meeting at.

It’s also quite common practice to have a friend call or text message you mid-date as this gives you the opportunity to let your loved ones know you are OK. It’s the perfect opportunity to announce some “important business” that you simply must attend to if the date is not working out.

3. Meet Somewhere Neutral

Don’t entertain people in your own home. It’s just not safe.

Plus, those grubby hand prints on the coffee table and that stack of unwashed dishes piled by the sink are the last things that should be on your mind when meeting someone new.

It’s far better to meet your date somewhere neutral and tidy such as a cafe or bar — where someone else is paid to do the cooking and the cleaning.

Plus, your date won’t suffer the indignity of having to retrieve plastic blocks from their buttocks after sitting on your child’s Lego.

4. Find Your Own Way There

Don’t accept a lift to or from the date, no matter how considerate or convenient.

Getting your own way there shows that you are self-sufficient and organized, two characteristics that never fail to impress, so flash your independence like the badge of honor it is.

For those new to the wonders of public transportation, services don’t always run according to timetables, so make sure you factor in time for such delays. Being late cuts into valuable getting-to-know-you time, and you’ll arrive flustered and flushed.

5. Meet Somewhere Specific

When dreaming up a potential date venue, make sure you have a specific meeting spot visualized in your mind’s eye.

If your meeting will take place “just inside” or “out the front,” you’ve got a very good chance of missing your date altogether.

If possible, find a landmark or other such marker and make this the meeting point. “I’ll be standing by the cardboard cut-out of Tom Cruise in the cinema foyer” is infinitely better than “I’ll be at the snack bar.”

6. Plan a Time Frame

Meeting someone new might be the start of something amazing — or not. So in the early days, limit your dates to a set amount of time.

An hour or two should be enough for you to assess your date’s potential, and cut your losses if things aren’t quite what you’re looking for. Shorter dates also make things easier for you to find a child minder if required, particularly at short notice.

And if your date is going better than expected, you can always make plans to meet up again through the week to continue where you left off.

7. Adult Conversation

While you might feel intense relief at being able to let your hair down – drink or swear if you so desire — don’t let your inhibitions drop so far that you create a bad impression.

Don’t hint at anything sexual, no matter how hot your date is; there’s plenty of time for that on subsequent dates. If you’re a parent, do try to keep kid-focused conversation to a minimum, even if you are dating another single parent.

Sure, being Mum or Dad may be your number one priority, but if you’re hoping to meet someone new, they have to hear how warm, funny and smart you are — not how adorable your kids are.

8. And Speaking of the Kids

Depending on how old your offspring are, you’ll no doubt have to field the odd inquisitive question about where you’re going — and with whom. “Out with a friend,” should satisfy most kids, and it’s best to spare your children from further details or a face-to-face meeting until you decide whether your new relationship is going somewhere.

So if you’re newly single and ready to launch a new phase in your romantic life, keep these tips in mind; you’ll be meeting fun and interesting new friends in no time.

9. Cause for Concern

In dating as in life, your intuition and gut feelings are two excellent resources that you have at your disposal, so listen to your instincts when meeting someone new.

Warning bells should ring loudly if your date: