Dating can be a roller coaster of ups and downs, twists and turns. One day you enjoy dating, the next you’d rather cut off a finger than go on a first date. At some point, most of us wonder if we’re wasting our time. No, we’re not. Going on first dates, while stressful, is a valuable experience not to be missed.

That’s crazy, you say? You say that dating is a waste of time and you wish Mr. Right would just show up already? Fair enough, but that’s unrealistic. You need to date men to get to know them.

How are you going to find him if you don’t take the time to DATE him? Yes, you’ve been on bad first dates with enough guys to fill a stadium, and you want no more of that. But what if you adopted some new ideas about dating? Let’s look at some of the thoughts you have now and decide whether they’re valid points that serve you.

There are No Good Guys Out There

If that’s true, why are my clients finding all kinds of good guys to date? And they live in towns ranging from 3,500 people all the way up to millions. Good guys are out there looking for you.

But if you don’t put yourself on the dating scene or make time to go out, they can’t find you! Just as you’re a catch and looking, plenty of good men are searching also… for you.

Go on that first date, and look at it as a learning experience. What can you take away from this date and being with this man that will help you down the road? No date will ever be a waste if you can look at it that way. Experience, enjoy, and learn. That’s all you need to do.

Dates Always End up the Same Way… no Spark on his End, so Why Bother?

Are you sure there was no spark, or did you sabotage that first date so there wouldn’t be? Sometimes we go on a date expecting it to end badly, and of course it does. What if you decided to have fun on the next date no matter what? How would that change the ending?

All Men Want is Sex. I Don’t Want the Hassle

Yes, we men are driven to have sex. It’s hard wired for us to want you. But most of us can harness that desire if we choose to. And the good ones do. It may be difficult to tell the good from the bad before you go on that date, but trust your gut. It will tell you if a guy just wants sex or if he’s potential relationship material.

Some women choose to make it clear that they do not have sex on the first date. That’s one way to ensure he knows where you stand, and then you are definitely not wasting your time going on a first date because you both know what to expect.

I Have Better Things to do

Such as? I’m being serious. What do you have going on that’s more important? If you have kids, that may be the case. But if you’re single and alone and living with a cat, what better things do you have to do, honestly?

I Hate Dating

I used to hate it too, until I decided to look at it as a learning experience. I met many nice women and discovered what I wanted and didn’t want in a partner. That kind of education and clarity could never be a waste of time.

When you don’t make time to date, you don’t make time for love to find you. Get out there and go on a first date!